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My friend Morgan Rogen said some very insightful things about my sex life the other day. She said I looked like someone who needs to get down and dirty with more than one woman every day if possible at all.

She also said words aren't sexy: smells are and fluids. Words are heady, and you couldn’t give head with words in your mouth.

I asked her how we got into discussing words and heads when I thought we were talking about my sex life.

Morgan did not respond to that and said instead she almost choked last time she gave head to her father only three days before he died at 65.

I asked: your father? She said yes. I said I was sorry to hear it that must have been awful and that I was surprised to hear her talk about it so freely. How she felt about it.

She said it was OK and that there wasn’t much to say about it, really. ‘What happens in the family stays in the family’ were her exact words, I think.

Morgan Rogen doesn’t even exist. I only made her up to have someone to talk to. She surprises me every time.

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Marcus Speh is based in Berlin and writes for fun and fame.

He's got nothing to flawnt at http://marcusspeh.com and is working on a novel set on Mars, lushly populated with artificial life forms and infused with 22nd century humor.